Funny Food Quotes

In my opinion, a good laugh is just as important to personal health as eating right and exercise. In fact, if I had to list the top three healthy habits, they would be green tea, broccoli and laughter. Laughter improves our overall state of mind and sense of satisfaction with life, raising our energy level and causing us to lean less on unhealthy "comfort" foods. With that in mind, check out these funny food quotes and remember them the next time you spend some time in your kitchen. You can also register to receive jokes and other funny stuff by e-mail from our team here at Recipe4Living.

Share these quotes with your loved ones, sneak them into lunchboxes, and write them on unsuspecting chalkboards and whiteboards everywhere. Laugh it up!

In my experience, clever food is not appreciated at Christmas. It makes the little ones cry and the old ones nervous. Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.

In Mexico we have a word for sushi: bait. Jose Simons

She had always warned them to wave a plate of rice and peas before her nose when she was in her coffin, to make certain there was no mistake; for if a breath of life was left in her, she would sit up and eat, but if she smelled the hopping-john, and did not stir, then they could just nail down the coffin and be certain she was truly dead. Carson McCullers (The Member of the Wedding, 1946)

All I ask of food is that it doesn't harm me. Michael Palin

The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found. Calvin Trillin

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick, not wounded, dead. Woody Allen

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat. Alex Levine

I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals. I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants. AW Brown

If a lump of soot falls into the soup and you cannot conveniently get it out, stir it well in and it will give the soup a French taste. Jonathan Swift

I don't like food that's too carefully arranged; it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture I'd buy a painting. Andy Rooney

My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four; unless there are three other people. Orson Welles

Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese. Gilbert K. Chesterton

The devil came to me last night and asked what I wanted in exchange for my soul. I still can't believe I said pizza. Friggin' cravings. Marc Ostroff

Watermelon -- it's a good fruit. You eat, you drink, you wash your face. Enrico Caruso

I put instant coffee in my microwave oven and almost went back in time. Steven Wright

You can tell alot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jellybeans. Ronald Reagan

There are five elements: earth, air, fire, water and garlic. Louis Diat

American consumers have no problem with carcinogens, but they will not purchase any product, including floor wax, that has fat in it. Dave Barry

I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time'. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance. Steven Wright

I had a dream last night, I was eating a ten pound marshmallow. I woke up this morning and the pillow was gone. Tommy Cooper